Anyone, who has been following along with my blog since the beginning of this year, would have been following along with my blog series “Transitions: Waiting for a Season of Change” and they would know what season of life I am in right now.
According to a fellow sister blogger, it’s an “Incubation to the Extraordinary.” It feels as though I am still the caterpillar waiting in my cocoon until the day I can emerge a butterfly. Slowly, the cocoon is shedding and slowly I can feel my wings emerging, but I can’t yet fly free because I have not yet been completely released from my shell.
I can feel the sunshine slightly beating on my face, but it is not yet spring.
Now what does all that mean in plain ordinary English. I can see signs, big and clear, of the possibilities of many prayers that I have, for years, been praying, hoping and believing for the day they would be answered, being answered, but not quite.
There are obstacles and challenges, and the path to these answered prayers are not smooth sailing, nor is the sailing in my hands. It is completely out of my control. There isn’t much of anything I can do but wait and hope the puzzle pieces that seem to fit will actually fit together, and this particular season of wait will be over.
Is this all a part of God’s master plan? Why is all my answered prayers dangling in front of me and I have not yet grasp them? What is going on? Is God being a big tease?
In between, my faith that “all things work together for the good of those who love God” “Seek ye first, and all these things will be added unto you,” “I know the plans I have for you, plans to proper you, to give you hope and a future,” “ask, seek and knock.”
In between, my faith that God is working it all out for me, as he has many times before. In between my faith that God would never forsake the faithful. In between my trust are hints of fear, times of worry, discouragement and frustration.
I’m afraid, that what I see happening, the doors I see opening, the possibilities of being given more will fade away, will be closed, will just not work out.
My heart would be devastated and very much broken.
Would God do that, dangle your answered prayers in front of you and then pull it away from you before you can get to them?
God does a lot of things we do not understand. Like allow you to carry and love a baby for nine months, then only allow you to keep him for a short time after his birth.
So what is the plan here? What is He doing?
I am trusting that it will be alright in the end, that He is still working on my behalf and He will move the parties involved to open these doors completely, to more, to better.
But what if I am wrong?